Trees

The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit.
- Moliere





I figure this makes me feel better when I don't quite feel like the adult I should be.

Ice Storm

There's nothin' like 86 degree weather one week...the joys of open toe pumps, no jackets, and long walks with the puppy...then...there's an ice storm. It wasn't so bad, we had an "ice day" and missed a day of work, but today it was back to business. It all started on Tuesday. They swore it would be the next ice age..then it was just rain. Darn you Pete Delkus.





But later that night there was ice. I spent the majority of the "ice day" being lazy, watching theTX Dot cams on the news for over 2 hours. You'd be surprised how entertaining it was to just sit, and watch cars slip and slide down the mix master in downtown Ft Worth, namely I-35 North. Cars would go 5 miles and hour and still freak out after a 6 degree slide to the left. I didn't quite understand why a few of them would refuse to move their car after that for another 45 minutes due to fear, especially since cars behind them were doubling in numbers by the minute. I can see how losing control of one's car can be scary, I nearly flipped over a truck because of black ice, but I was going 60 mph. There would be more of an impact with bumper cars than the cars out on the road that day..but I digress.




My first day back on the road today proved harmless. Despite the "frozen fog" it was a decent drive.





Overall there's a simplicity I love about these rainy, foggy, icy cold days. It seems like a little black ice, while dangerous, can give you the much needed excuse to go slow an enjoy the sounds of some Spektor or Dave while on the road. It's nice when the flashing lights flash to the beats of the music, and for the span of the song "Raindrops" or "Jimi Thing" you almost feel like you are in your own personal music video. It all seems to fall into place, your thoughts, your environment. There's something like a little precipitation, that puts things into perspective.

Because after awhile, the glow wears off...

That's how I feel about the holidays and many a subject in my life. From experience I've learned everything is great and exciting at first...then give it some months, years, bumps, and detours and eventually what made you radiant makes you...back to square one. Not so much changed, altered, or improved because when it comes down to it, you are who you are. We let our situations and current environments lead us to believe that it is who we are. Ex: I am this happy person during Christmas, I am this smitten lover with him or her, I am a person who loves my job (when I'm doing it well) or I'm more evolved around this group or that. It's all situational. Change the situation and who are you? Are you the type to question everything in existence because of one situation? I am. I let one death, or two, completely alter my life in a way that isn't beneficial. I let the influence of one person make me think maybe my life isn't as pleasing to me as I originally thought. One broken cellphone call totally screw up my day. I'm tired of getting myself into unhealthy situations that change who I am. I'm tired of the glow...because when it wears off, it's just going to be me under there.




Christmas and New Years glimmered with hope, and all of the false promise of change and new beginnings is starting to wear. My year hasn't had the best start, but after a couple of weeks, I've decided on a resolution...I've decided to not let my situation form who I am...even when the glow wears off.