I'm a Mommy!

So we are a week into being the proud parents of beautiful twin girls.

Oh. My. Word.




We are in the car on our way to our hometown now to go to their first event, a baby shower! This is the only time I could blog, sitting between two car seats as daddy is searching for Christmas music that isn't depressing and about love lost on Pandora.

Here are my thoughts so far in no particular order:

1) The initial fear has faded some. We've had a great support system living with us at home so I am a bit worried if I can handle this once they're gone. I feel inept at times because this is so new and my husband is much more natural about it. I know it'll take one moment of being alone with both of them crying and I'll feel more confident, well, once they stop screaming.

2) I can't wait to go to the mall, I see it now...
"Are these your girls? Twins? They're beautiful! So tiny!"

"Yes, they're mine! Thank you!"

"You look great for having twins!"

"Thanks! You know I don't have one single stretch mark and my breasts look fabulous still!"

3) On a more serious note, my biggest hurdle is really within. I don't want to be a control freak mama. I'm naturally a control freak so the idea of my girls even being in a room of 60+ people (hello Mexican baby shower) makes me shudder (because of germs, not because they're Mexicans). Send relaxed, stress free thoughts my way!

4) I already get sad knowing they'll grow so fast and they're barely 6 pounds now!

5) The actual exchange with the birth mother actually was beautiful. There wasn't reluctance on her part, some tears, but she stayed strong. I wish I could say the same, I walked into the sanctuary in tears, overwhelming joy and gratitude. I embraced the birthmother before I ever looked at my daughters. She handed one to me, and our mediator and pastor handed the other to my husband. We talked briefly, prayed and even took photos for the girls when they get older. After the birth mom left, we changed the girls, and our families came over to meet them. We took lots of photos that I'll share on...

6) a mommy blog. Yes. I know I've criticized the mommy blog before. This is my moment of irony and I don't care. I'm keeping this blog fairly baby free and will create an additional blog just about my adventures raising twins. I'll advertise that blog here but probably won't advertise this blog there because I'm a freak like that who doesn't particularly care for people I know reading this.

That's it for now. I see a nap in my future.

*I'm also not editing this because...I'm sleepy.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Mommyhood Coming To A Blogger Near You?

Could it be?

It seems so.

Tomorrow a young mother is scheduled to sign her rights away at my lawyers office. Saturday at 10 a.m. we are scheduled to pick up twin 1 month old girls who we will name Mila and Lola. The adoption process then takes place but they will be in our custody right away.

I am over the moon. I am scared. I'm excited. I feel way too unworthy.

I've lost so much sleep, but last night I slept and dreamed of my girls. When I woke up, it's like I almost felt their presence in our home. For a second I thought maybe I had already had them. Today I cried at the mere thought of them.

God remembered me, He never forgot, and He was waiting until this good and perfect time to give us our children.

I didn't want to blog until I had them, but I've had an overwhelming sense of emotion and such a small window of time to process this that I HAD to write to let some things out and use this blog for what I originally intended.

I am so ready yet so unprepared for this next step in our lives.

Wish us luck!

Annoying People on Facebook

This one has been a long time coming. Please indulge while I share my issues with some of the people I call "friend" on Facebook. It would be much easier to just delete them but this day in age removing someone from your friends list is just as bad punching them in the junk, plus, it's not as fun if I can't make fun of them on my crappy little blog I don't share with anyone other then a bunch of strangers, right?

Here we go, feel free to add anyone I may have missed...

The "I'm So Lost in Life" FaceBooker
This person is a hot mess and doesn't care who knows. They're depression is so annoying at times you feel bad for almost wanting to say yeah, jump.

The "I love him, oh wait, I HATE him" FaceBooker
This person shares entirely way too much about their personal life especially when it comes to the areas of the heart. The make up and break up more than you change your under ware.

The "You Wanna Piece of Me?" Facebooker
This person likes to fight and although claims will "slapaho" in person but actually never does. They are always looking for reasons to feel "wronged" via status update, wall post, and comment. They like the word "haters."

The "Im So Cool and Indie and You're Not" FaceBooker
These hipsters posts links of indie group videos and Urban Outfitter fashions when they're not quoting someone who died 70 years ago. They would like you to think they have depth. Oh, and they also all have a passion for photography, the 40's-60's, vintage clothes, Phish, and artsy fartsy self portraits where they are facing the camera but looking elsewhere. They spend $60 on a white v-neck from American Apparel but will have you convinced it's vintage.

The "Da, Dat, Wat, Whut" FaceBooker
This person knows the English language but decides to massacre it daily with their ridiculous pronunciations and misspelling.

The "My Life is SO Perfect and My Kids Are The MOST Adorable Things EVER! You Agree Right?? Right??" FaceBooker
This person updates in extreme detail of their family adventures. They post pictures from every trip to the petting zoo and make sure everyone around them knows life is just peachy. Their husband is the best daddy ever and their kids just love each other so much but we all know if that was true they wouldn't try so hard to prove it to everyone else.

The "I'm Going to Post 10 Music Videos in One Hour" FaceBooker
This person is the reason you filter your News Feed. They either post electronic dance music that ALL sounds the same or they go from Texas Country to 90's West Coast rap in less than 6 minutes.

The "Gamer" Facebooker
This person sends Farmville requests daily and shamelessly ask people if anyone can water their farm or whatever via Status Update. These are people you cannot hang out with in real life.

The "Can You Read Through My Subliminal Messages?" FaceBooker
This person wants you to ask what they're talking about. They want you to be interested yet they don't want to show all of their cards thinking this makes them dark and mysterious.

The "Here Are 12 More Pouty Lip/Fish Face Photos of Me From Above Looking Down" FaceBooker
These are usually girls who love 6 pictures in a row of themselves in the same pose. They try to get all artsy on you through putting it through some crap Paint program so you can see the same freakin' picture in shades of blue, green and pink.

The "Quoter" FaceBooker
This person has nothing intelligent to offer so they just use someone else's words. In all actuality if they didn't master the art of "Copy/Paste" they would probably misspell a few of the words they're quoting.


The "Dear" Person
This person likes to write to inanimate objects via Status Update. "Dear Microwave, today was a very bad day to break.."

Who did I miss...?

Home at the lake...

So I may have mentioned before that I grew up by a lake in West Texas. Naturally there aren't many lakes in Texas although many medium to large sized towns in Texas can boast of a lake but really there is only one natural lake in Texas and even that one has been altered, Lake Caddo if you must know. The rest are all man made lakes.

There isn't much to do while living by the lake unless you really enjoy fresh water fishing which I did as a child. When I wasn't fishing I spent most of my childhood walking by the water, skipping rocks, investigating every path and tree top and collecting rocks which doesn't seem particularly fun unless, of course, you are a child.

I miss the stars. I miss the colorful leaves and different shades of dirt.

Simple things.

I love what the city has to offer, but when I go back home to the lake I try to take as much of it in.

One day my parents will pass, we'll sell the old lake house - and we won't have a reason to go any longer. This makes me sad so I just take more and more pictures hoping to preserve the memory.

This is what happens when you take a picture of the sun, it comes out like a scene in Harry Potter

Funny how even a man made lake has God written all over it.

World of Jenks: Herschel Sims

I love my hometown. There is so much I miss about it from time to time. I miss going to the store and running into half a dozen people I know. I miss going to La Popular Bakery on Pine St, and I miss Friday night football. We have football in the DFW area, but West Texas football is a totally different creature.

Abilene High Eagles at the 2009 State Tournament in the Alamodome 

The town is ghostlike on a Friday night. When our team is on the road, the fans follow. When we play our crosstown rivals - you're covered in your school's colors from head to toe. Every, class, age, and color is covered. The game is the highlight of the week, and staying true to tradition, begins and ends with a prayer.

My old high school won last year's state championship and the pride felt as we witnessed these young men make history was priceless. Our hometown once again came in huge groups to show their support.

Once again the Abilene High Eagles are in the playoffs and what a great way to kick off post season play then a feature on MTV?  Andrew Jenks, documentary filmmaker from The World of Jenks recently covered Herschel Sims, Abilene High Running Back and his struggle to the top.

Bring the tissues.

I was definitely prepared to witness an overwhelming sense of joy upon seeing my hometown featured on MTV, but the surge of emotions that came with it left me humbled. The story behind Herschel's upbringing and his experiences as a child to young man had me floored. How is it he suffered through so much and has still continued to beat all odds against him and flourish not only as a star athlete, but a star human being?

He is one of the best in the nation, and projected to be an even bigger deal in the collegiate and professional world of football but when he said he'd give it all up in a heartbeat to have a home with a mom and dad? Wow.

I'll let the documentary tell the rest. Please watch it here.

Listfully Yours

It's been awhile, here's a list.

1) So I realize now I did in fact blog high. Getting my wisdom teeth out is something I've avoided for over 12 years and now I wonder why. I can't believe the stuff they give you at the oral surgeon is even legal. It's awesome. I want more.

2) My family is picking up the pieces from the the chaos a couple of weeks ago. Thanksgiving may be especially difficult, but if the time we spent together after the services is any indication that a ridiculously big Mexican family can overcome even the biggest of tragedies then I think we'll enjoy our time together and be able to really be thankful for those of us that have made it through.

3) I lost my license. Suuuuck.

4) We've been approached by a set of pastors who are working with a young mother right now regarding adoption. She has two children already (she's 18) and has just given birth to twin girls that she feels she cannot take care of. Enter us. How do I feel about it? Despite knowing now I CAN in fact get pregnant, makes it almost impossible for me to fathom turning down an opportunity to take in these two infants. I asked my husband, "What if we adopt these two baby girls, and six months from now I end up pregnant?" His response "That'd be awesome! If anyone can do it, we can." Wow. Well, I always DID want a lot of kids..

5) My cousin just got married in Vegas yesterday. I find this blog worthy because at this time last year she didn't even have her first boyfriend, then almost overnight they're engaged, now married. She waited 26 years for this which by most people's standards these days, 26 is still young to wed, but the item I find particularly interesting is she didn't have her big wedding. Her family wasn't even there to share in the nuptials. I know a lot of people prefer it this way, but I know her and I really thought she would enjoy fthe whole wedding planning process. To this day I think of things I'd like a "re-do" on when it comes to my wedding, mainly details but to this day they bother me. I can't imagine the sense of regret I would have felt if I had an impromptu wedding, sans family, sans tradition almost immediately after. I guess love does make you do crazy things. I hope it's something she doesn't regret.

Welp that's it. There's my update, more blogs to follow.

Big toofs

Weeeee! No unicorns I'm sleeps now

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone